PAKISTAN THE REBIRTH

The date 25th December is an important day to Pakistanis all over the world. It marks the birthday of the creator and Father Of Pakistan Mohammed Ali Jinnah, but after todays event the date I feel will also represent the rebirth of Pakistan.

For me as a second generation British Pakistani my relationship with Pakistan has always been an interesting one. As most Pakistani children of Immigrant parents, I grew up hearing the stories of the Homeland, of distant childhoods and faraway memories. Pakistan was to me my roots an instringient part of what made me who I was. Like most people my age that link with Pakistan was never severed, holidays and visiting family members made sure that door was fully open for us, but honestly it was never something you really thought about. You were Pakistani, end of, but what did that really mean? You were proud of the fact but proud of what? It didn't really matter it was always more of a natural affiliation. A part of our British Pakistani mindset, knowing that to forget that part of us would ultimately lead to a sense of total confusion and isolation. 

As I got older things began to change, my view of Pakistan became less rosy as the cracks began to appear. I started to notice the politics and the corruption, each leader after leader more corrupt then the previous. As my naivety about Pakistan fell away I noticed the dynasties of families like the Bhutto's and the sharrif's, I started to notice that this wasn't a free or fair country at all. As I got older I began to realise how hard life for most Pakistani's really was, the poverty and inequality, the importance of money and power over love and loyalty. 

As a child when I visited Pakistan I found everything about it magical and wondrous. When the electric gave out and we were plunged into darkness for hours I thought it a splendid game, running around the house with cousins playing hide and seek. It's only as an adult I understand the disgrace of a country like Pakistan failing it's citizens for up to 6 hrs at a time, leaving them with no electricity. How adverse it affects are on the average Pakistani especially the poor. How are business able to succeed and offer employment in such situations?

The older I grew the more the stories of bright blue skies and trees bearing the sweetest of fruits faded, replaced by the realer images of the victims of modern day Pakistan, the victims of floods, the victims of drone attacks, the victims of the Taliban, the victims of the West, the victims of poverty and diseases. It just felt to me watching from afar that Pakistan was sinking and sinking fast.

It broke my heart to watch the people suffering like this, it wasn't the fault of Pakistan, but the fault of those who were supposed to be its protectors, the Zidari's, the Bhutto's, the Ali's, the Sharif's and all the other bloodsucking leeches that reigned at the helm.

I watched as the American's invaded Afghanistan, I watched as they eased their way into Pakistan, buying themselves a place in Zidari's bed. I continued watching on in horror as drone attacks killed my brothers and sisters, when bomb blasts maimed and killed innocents. I continued watching on as Black water operatives ran amok in Pakistan, when Raymond Davis walked free after killing innocent Pakistanis. It broke my heart and filled me with pain. When others told me Pakistan had sold out all I could do was hang my head in shame. It hurt my heart to admit it was true. Every time another drone killed innocent women and children I hung my head a little lower. When I heard that people were still living in tents 2 years after the floods I hung my head lower. When I read of the treatment of the Balochi I hung my head lower still.

It was like a whirlwind of emotions for me and other British Pakistanis the last few years. There is the shame at what we have become and the fear of where we will end up. There is the pain for all those suffering but regardless there will always be the love. 

People think because we are British born and live in the Uk what happens in Pakistan doesn't affect us, of course it does, Pakistan will always be our homeland. It is the soil that bore my mother. It is the blood that flows through my veins. The distance does not matter when it comes to Pakistan. Her pain is our pain, her shame is our shame and her destruction is our destruction. The hurt and the frustration comes from having to watch from afar feeling helpless, like voyeurs on the destruction of our past.

I had come to a point where I couldn't even bare to hear it anymore. It pained me so greatly to know that there was nothing I could do, what could we do so many thousands of miles away. The open debates, the blog posts, the rallies, the fundraising, we did all we could do from here, but it was never enough. It was even more frustrating when we could see that there was an answer but it was being blocked at every corner.

What was that answer? It was Imran Khan of course. When I first learnt of Imran Khan's foray into politics I was a little confused as I was of that generation that as a child would watch him playing cricket for Pakistan. But as I looked into him I could see that his style and position on politics appealed to me. His Cancer hospitals are amazing. I lost my Gran in Pakistan to cancer and understand how difficult and expensive it is to treat out there. Here was the first politician to have ever actually given back to Pakistan, however now I hear that he's also built the first private sector University offering international degrees and 90% student scholarships. 

Imran Khan gave me a glimmer of hope, at the time granted it was a small glimmer but it was still there. I have to admit my respect increased ten fold when he escaped house arrest in 2007. I had a feeling that these guys were going to find it hard to get rid of Imran and I was right.

Imran khan has taken his share of insults and of put downs and so has his followers, if I could count the times that I have been laughed at for believing in him, the amount of times I have been told he has no substance and will never succeed. Maybe if you gave me a pound for all those times I could get my ticket to visit Pakistan.

Recently things have started to change, there is a change in the air. Maybe it was the influence of the Arab spring, maybe Pakistani's had just had enough. Rumours are currently going around that Zidari is about to sign a treaty with the USA that we can never use our nuclear weapons first. We may as well sign the whole lot over to Obama, that's what the USA always wanted Pakistan's Nuclear power and our natural resources. Which may I add is a vast amount and if it was lining the pockets of average pakistani instead of greedy politicians and the Americans would make Pakistan a very wealthy nations?

So wether its encouragement due to the arab spring or it was just the right time ...Pakistan is having her time. She is fed up with hanging her head in shame like a battered housewife, she is fighting back and she is getting stronger.

Today on the birthday of our founding farther Mohammed Ali Jinnah, Imran Khan helped Pakistan to be reborn, to be the Pakistan that Jinnah always dreamed of, what she should have been not what she became. 

I sat with my family watching the proceedings unfold. There was a buzz in the house, my parents beamed with pride, I admit I shed a few tears, we stared mesmerised to our screens for hours, watching the crowds cheering on Imran. I listened transfixed to his speeches, the talk of more hospitals and schools, of free education and health care. Of an end to corruption and the destruction of pride. I felt humbled by his apology to the people of Balchostan..and his promise to all Pakistanis regardless of religion, language or region to take Pakistan back to glory. 

Now many could argue that I am getting excited over nothing. That these are just hollow words, he will turn out like the rest. Well, I would have to argue that, I have been taught to judge a man on his actions rather then his words and going by IK past record and clear transparency I doubt very much that things are going to be any different. IK is a man that has always stuck to his word and carried himself with grace and class. Why should this time be any different?

As well as watching him I obviously had to join in with what Twitter was saying, after all this is where all the real news happens !!! I was amazed to see how flooded my time line was with pro PTI tweets, I was even more amazed to see that PTI Jalsa was the second most prevalent trending on twitter. It seemed Imran had kind of hijacked christmas!! It was exciting. It felt like a historical moment today, I remember my mum saying that she couldn't remember the last time that she had been so excited in Pakistani politics. I sincerely hope this continues.

So as a Pakistani living so far away from her Motherland I am here waiting with bated breath to see what happens next. I am proud to say that we are fighting back and uniting, I just pray Inshallah that we continue down this road. It is time for change and the PTI Tsunami has just hit lets hope it continues

Pakistan zindabad

HIJAB PART TWO - HASNAE

Part one of my project “Hijab” has been received so well by you all. Many of you have told me that you cannot wait for part two. To be honest neither could I so here it is xx I really hope you guys enjoy it and stay with me as we go through the rest of the series. So come on lets enjoy the diversity and the strength of these amazing women.

Part 2 is Hasnae. I met Hasnae about a year ago when she booked me to photograph her 21st birthday. I've stayed in touch with this funny, witty and intelligent young lady ever since. 

Hasnae is amongst a growing number of highly educated and motivated young Muslim women. Combining her practise of  Islam with her studies. she has recently completed her degree in Abrahamic Religions and is currently working on her Masters in Near and Middle Eastern Studies, majoring in Islamic law. For me women like Hasnae represent great strength in the face of an ever changing world.

She is part of what we call the MTV generation, from teens to people in their early 20's that have grown up in a culture of excess. Of sex, alcohol, and drugs, bombarded with images of total nihilism. She is part of a generation where young women are force fed images of over-sexualised females, influenced to believe the less garments worn the more liberated as a woman you become. What really intrigues me is how amongst all these negatives of society she and other young women like her find the strength to prevent negatives having an impact on their thoughts, progress, beliefs and lives. It is this strength which makes these young women so confident as to go against the norms of general society and their British peers. Choosing instead to dress with modesty.

Hasnae and others have freely chosen to follow the paths of their ancestors and maintain such an outwardly symbol of Islam. These are the strong inspirational women of the future. I believe we should give them all the encouragement and support that we can, which is no less than what they deserve.

What made you decide to wear the hijab?

I wore the headscarf properly, as in wore it and never took it off, at the age of 15. Before that as a child, I'd take it off every summer because it was too hot!

I'm grateful I did that because I was able to freely experiment until I decided to put it on and keep it on. It was never a forced practice; Mum always explained the benefits and the rest was left to me. Because of that all - I'm happy with my decision in wearing it. I was encouraged to always think independently and this has strengthened every act I do.

Despite the fact that the religious reasons of covering the hair are yet to leave me satisfied, I strongly stand by the practice because it's a rich part of my upbringing and background.

How does wearing the hijab make you feel?

I've never really thought about how wearing the headscarf makes me feel before I was asked this for the project. It's a bit like asking me how reading a book makes me feel, or how putting my pyjamas on before I get into bed, or how ordering my breakfast makes me feel. Oh no wait, ordering breakfast makes me feel very excited! But lame jokes aside, it's something I just do, I don’t really think about it. At this stage, it feels like an innate part of my life, an intrinsic practice. If I had to give this thought, I’d say it makes me feel safe, just like being sheltered makes one feel safe, or safer at least.

What have been the positives and negatives of wearing the hijab?

Positives to wearing the headscarf, I'd say it's easier than styling your hair! But really, it's a constant reminder to me of my submission to God.

Negatives to wearing the headscarf, I can't think of any, sorry. Really!

CLICKING ON THE IMAGE WILL ALLOW YOU TO ENLARGE

So that's the end of part two. Below you will see the word comment, if you click on it you can leave me some comments about the project so far. It would be really great if we could use this as a starting place for some discussions on the subject xxx

Domestic abuse- a hidden truth

Domestic violence, a touchy subject that we as a human society are far too scared to talk about and probe too deeply. Frightened by what we may unearth and discover. The fact that this so called civilised society is far removed from the civility that we paint it with is a scary thought. It's a dark ugly world where individuals are abused by the very people who are supposed to protect and nurture them.

I am fully aware that domestic violence affects men as well as woman but for this particular article I am looking at the situation that 1 in 4 woman in the UK has faced at one time in their lives. 

When you break it down like that suddenly you start to see how widespread the disease of domestic violence has become, and these statistics are only those that have been reported to the police. My mind wonders what could the real statistics be? If all such crimes were actually reported. A study by Walby and Allen in 2004 places the statistics closer to 45 % of women having experienced at least one incident of interpersonal violence in their lifetime. This is mind blowing to even comprehend. Are we living in a world so devoid of respect and decency that half the female population in this country alone has experienced such a situation.

We are taught to believe even as women that domestic violence is only experienced by weak women, those with a victim mentality. We convince ourselves that It could never happen to me. Honestly tell me, how many times have you blamed the woman? Saying that you have no sympathy for someone who stays in that situation. How many times have you argued that it could never happen to you? How many times have you said if it did you would be out of that door. We as women spout these lines not even realising that all we are doing is feeding into the shame element of domestic violence. Feeding into this them and us ideology. we are tapping into the dark part which strips away a woman's confidence, leaving her shadowed in loneliness and despair, feeling that she can't talk to anyone about it, that if she did she would be judged or mocked. This is a dangerous path for us to take as women. Why do we constantly try to perpetuate this divide between victims and non victims. Do we believe by doing this we are safe? Do we think by being these strong women that no one can come along and break us down? That by being strong in other parts of our lives that we can't be broken by someone in our personal lives. We must stop this form of thinking. We must stop doing the perpetrators job for them.

Whilst working in the public sector I attended many domestic violence courses, one point that clearly sticks in my mind is how domestic violence is not exclusive to any one group. The heinous crime of domestic violence covers all boundaries of society, from race, religion to class. Domestic violences does not just occur in working class homes, it is as prevalent in the quiet leafy suburbs  as it is in the run down high rise ghettos. Domestic violence  is not an ethnic problem to be solely blamed on either black or Muslim men, it is something that can occur in any community irrespectively.

When will we as humans learn, violence and hatred can spout any where where it is nurtured?it is not exclusive to any particular background race or any such factors. When will communities learn that tackling these issues internally is not wrong or again shameful? It doesn't make them worse or better then anyone else. It is not a stick that we can be beaten with. As a young asian female even within my own community I can see the reluctance to tackle domestic violence. There is this fear that if we expose it the whites or the west will think us savages, that they will use it as a way of making us seem inferior. I am sure there is a similar mindset in all communities. But only by admitting that these crimes occur in our smaller communities will we then see our wider society succeed 

However this takes me back to an earlier point I made of the almost cartoonish image of a battered wife. We are taught to see these women as weak willed and submissive. We are taught to never associate them with ourselves. Yet is just as likely that a high flying career woman can be a victim of domestic abuse, that girl with the loud voice and over abundance of what appears to be confidence can be a victim, the woman with what seems the perfect life could be a victim. There is no set type of woman that suffers from domestic violence, just as there is no set type of man that commits it. If we take the statistic that one in four women has suffered domestic violence in the UK, you have to start to realise that these women are all around you, that they are a part of your everyday life, she is everywhere. Maybe someone in your office has suffered, maybe its one of the mums at the school gates, maybe it's the lady in the supermarket queue, or your best friend. Maybe it's even you.

The way that domestic violence has always been portrayed, we as women are scared to speak up, scared to admit that we have been victimised. Worried about the stigma and the conclusions people will make. We fear that by exposing the situation that we have got ourselves into we will destroy any semblance of a normal life for ourselves. Because we believe these women to be weak we do not in turn want to admit that we are weak.

Another important point not to forget that after extensive brainwashing and stripping of humanity many women begin to blame themselves. Believing that in some way they deserved what happened to them. That if only they could improve as he suggested it would all stop. The sad thing is it begins to become a normality, an everyday part of these women's lives. They learn to hide the bruises, explain away the loud noises to the neighbours. And when it all becomes too much and the lies become harder to tell, they retreat, draw back into themselves, shutting themselves away from family and friends. It's this fear and control that allows these men to continue to get away with these crimes.

The scary thing is where does it all end? Does it end in 2 women killed a week by violent partners. Because essentially, this man, this person that is supposed to love you and protect you is slowly killing you, and in some cases they even succeed. 

But what I must stress is that domestic violence is not as black and white as it may first seem, domestic abuse comes in many forms, apart from the physical violence that we associate with it, it can come in the form of emotional abuse,threats of possible violence and rape financial abuse, neglect or control. It is important to remember these facts as well. Many women who are not being physically harmed and are controlled in other ways will justify that it is not abuse if no physical violence is used. They believe that no one will take them seriously if they cannot provide bruises. This is also domestic violence and is being taken seriously by police forces and domestic violence agencies country wide. You have to understand no form of control or violence is permit-able. It is wrong.

Sisters if you take anything away from this article it's to understand that you have nothing to be ashamed of. You have done nothing wrong. You are all beautiful and amazing. It is him that is wrong. It is him that should be ashamed of his actions not you, and as friends,colleges, family members we need to understand  and look out for the signs of abuse and help and support anyone going through such a traumatic experience.

I strongly urge any sister reading this who feels that she maybe suffering from domestic abuse to read the table below. If you are finding that many of your answers are yes, it maybe time to ask for help. ( please remember these are only a summary) Please do not be afraid, talk to someone, a friend, a family member, someone at your mosque/church. If you feel this is too much please find the number for domestic violence helpline below. They are fully trained to deal with any situation and can offer help and support. 

I will be writing a follow up article to this on violence pre marriage or relationship violence in the Muslim community.

24-hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline

0808 2000 247 - Run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge

SIGNS THAT YOU’RE IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
Your Inner Thoughts and Feelings	Your Partner’s Belittling Behaviour
Do you: feel afraid of your partner much of the time? avoid certain topics out of fear of angering your partner? feel that you can’t do anything right for your partner? believe that you deserve to be hurt or mistreated? wonder if you’re the one who is crazy? feel emotionally numb or helpless?	Does your partner: humiliate or yell at you? criticize you and put you down? treat you so badly that you’re embarrassed for your friends or family to see? ignore or put down your opinions or accomplishments? blame you for their own abusive behaviour? see you as property or a sex object, rather than as a person?
Your Partner’s Violent Behaviour or Threats	Your Partner’s Controlling Behaviour
Does your partner: have a bad and unpredictable temper? hurt you, or threaten to hurt or kill you?  threaten to take your children away or harm them? threaten to commit suicide if you leave? force you to have sex? destroy your belongings?	Does your partner: act excessively jealous and possessive? control where you go or what you do? keep you from seeing your friends or family? limit your access to money, the phone, or the car? constantly check up on you?

Sisters

Heard a great track today so I thought it would be great to share it with you guys xxx Enjoy

THANK YOU

Its 2 in the morning, I am sitting here wide awake and totally buzzing with excitement. I have just got in after an amazing catchup with my friend Takwa, who is visiting briefly from France.
Before going out I published the first part of the Hijab project. I also posted it to Twitter and Facebook and headed out to catch up with Takwa. I have to admit the project was there in my mind and I discussed it with her as I couldn't contain my excitement. But to be so frank I didn't expect such a response so quickly. I came home to emails, twitters and Facebook comments on my post. All so beautiful and so positive. The initial response has been overwhelming, and I feel from the bottom of my heart what I set out to do is being accomplished. I feel like a new mother watching her child's first foray into the world. I feel so proud, and even prouder of Ripa, the subject of the post. She really is inspirational and I am so ecstatic that the world gets to see the same beauty and strength that I am so fortunate to see.

Well with such a good reception I seem to be getting many new volunteers so all I can say is watch this space for part two xxxx

HIJAB PART 1

Here we go guys, the first instalment of my hijab project.

The first lady that is part of my project is Ripa. I met Ripa a few years ago when I worked in Newham with an organisation that helped local residents get back into work. When I first met Ripa she was one of our clients. A young Muslim women with three young daughters. She had come out of an abusive marriage and was trying to start a new life for her and her children. Ripa had such a good work ethic that she ended up being employed by the organisation itself. She now works helping people like herself realise their dreams, as well as working full time she is raising 3 young girls on her own. I admire her strength and resilience. The way that regardless of what life has thrown at her how she has succeeded and thrived. I admire how she still finds time to Islamically educated her daughters and be a wonderful mother. It proves to me that the myth that a Muslim woman is not strong and independent is just that a myth. She is an inspiration other young women like herself. If you work hard and have belief in Allah you can succeed in anything that you want.

What made you decide to wear the hijab?

I come from a very religious family where everyone wears the hijab. It was a given that at a certain age I too would have to wear it. To be honest as a teenager I didn't really give it much thought, it was just another garment, like putting on a cardigan. It was a norm for me. I married at a very young age, 17. My husband had met me in the hijab and expected me to continue to wear it. It was however a very abusive and controlling marriage, he even dictated to me that I had to wear the Niqab, it wasn't what I had chosen but because of the nature of our marriage I had no choice but to comply. To me the hijab at this point was never my choice, it was always something that someone else expected me to wear and controlled. Because it was never worn with what I now feel is the right intention I constantly struggled with it.

When my marriage ended for the first time I was free to make my own decisions. I decided to take my hijab off, I expected that not wearing the hijab would complement my freedom. I associated the restrictions that had been put on me during my marriage with the control my husband had in what I wore. I wanted to have the hairstyles that my friends had, I wanted to go to the places where they went. I truly thought that without the Hijab I was free.

However I have to admit for me this was not the case. I felt that some people no longer judged me by my personality or my brain but rather in more superficious terms. Maybe for me I needed to experience life without the Hijab to truly appreciate the beauty of it. This period in my life taught me that my life was not restricted by my hijab, it was rather the control that my ex used it for. I came to the realisation that I could achieve anything, do anything, my hijab did not hold me back.

For me I want to wear my hijab as I feel Islamically it is important for a woman to cover and show modesty. I have 3 young daughters, 2 twins aged 8 and another aged 7. I want to set a good example for them. They wear the hijab but it is their choice to do so, they want to copy Mummy which makes me so proud, however if they don't want to wear it that's their choice they are still kids. I want the hijab to be for them as it for me now, the right lifestyle choice.

How does wearing the hijab make you feel?

To be honest I actually feel more free wearing the Hijab, I feel like I am in control and that I have made an important decision but the decision was all mine. The hijab in my life poses no restrictions for me. I am happy, I am fulfilled. I truly believe that wearing the hijab should be a woman's choice. Only then can you really appreciate it for what it is.

What have been the positives and the negatives of wearing the hijab?

I feel like by wearing the hijab and living my life as Islamically as I can I am setting a good role model to other young Muslim women.

When I divorced from my husband life was quite scary and it took me a while to get back on my feet. Slowly I learnt about services available to me and resources I could access. When I put the Hijab back on it gave me the courage to get my life back in order. I now work with local Newham residents including single mothers like myself get back into work. Funnily enough it is the same company I joined as a client when I wanted help myself. I feel that the most positive thing about the hijab is all the courage it has given me to get this far. It makes me feel like I have achieved so much.

For myself I do not feel that there are any negative aspects to me wearing the Hijab. I've had a few comments in the past but generally they do not upset or faze me, they are just other people's ignorance.

However sometimes I feel that people can be quiet judgemental about the hijab and the niqab. This I feel can come equally from non muslims and muslims. But I put that down to their personal ignorance and not let it affect all the positivity I feel about wearing my Hijab.

CLICK ON IMAGE TO ENLARGE

So that's the end of part one. Below you will see the word comment, if you click on it you can leave me some comments about the project so far. It would be really great if we could use this as a starting place for some discussions on the subject xxx

SKIN BLEACHING

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4-22HfgZI4

Growing up as an Asian in the Uk I have always been aware of skin lightening creams such as Fair and Lovely. I remember as a child that their advertisements would pop up in Asian magazines, adverts etc. A white looking Asian woman with long flowing hair, bright eyed and happy. To me it wasn't anything unusual let alone sinister.

Many girls growing up around me used these creams, many of my Asian and black friends had been given the creams by older sisters, cousins and even mothers. It seemed to be an accepted part of a coloured woman's beauty regime. As normal as brushing your teeth in the morning.

Luckily for me my parents never adhere to such madness and I missed out on the whole mother to daughter passing down of the skin bleaching cream. How ever being born in a generally light skinned light eyed family I was considered by many of my peers to be lucky. Growing up I could never understand why this was, often girls would sigh and say they wished they had the same skin tone or eyes as me. It left me puzzled and a little amused. For me I thought them all beautiful from the light to the dark.

It's a big part of Asian and black culture to put too much emphasis on skin tone, often incorrectly believing that light skin leads to better jobs, finding a better partner, greater success and popularity. We have to wonder why we associate success with lighter skin. Is it because we cannot shake out colonial pasts and believe that the closer we resemble our masters the more their status and success will rub off on us? or is it something that can be traced back even further. I personally believe that colonialism plays a major part in our belief that lighter is brighter. However I believe roots existed before that.
In rural Asian and African countries the poor work the fields, on the land in the blazing sun day in day out resulting in darker skins, while the rich and the royalty sat in canopy's and grand summer houses sheltered from the sun. Servants standing over them with sun umbrellas. I believe that we have always had in us this belief that poverty is associated with dark skin, while riches and comfort with whiter skin. All colonialism did was confirm this for us.

So ok we are talking about the past now, how does this affect women today, the feudal system is not what it used to be, people have emigrated all over the world, white people have started tanning yet we still associate lighter skin tones with success. It's something that will take time to break down.Years of brainwashing cannot be so easily undone. I luckily had a mother that was progressive for her time and understood the dangers of bleaching, in her 3 daughters she has instilled a belief to love what you are whether its light or dark it is what God gave you, morals and ethics which we will pass down to our daughters thus breaking this chain of self mutilation. I am sure many young women are now wisening up to the manipulation of skin bleaching and will break their own chains.

As a photographer I make a point of not whitening or darkening my models. It is important for me to convey to my clients that they are all beautiful, a shade change is not going to enhance their beauty. Their beauty is who they are...it is not defined by anything. I think as women of colour we need to embrace and love our selves a little more. We need to break the bonds of stereotypes and presumptions and understand we are more than a skin shade, we are stronger then a colour chart. We are we.

So please understand, if I do a shoot for you I will be offended if you ask me to change your shade, and please do not be offended when I tell you you are lovely as you are xxx

PDC STUDIOS

I'm sitting here recovering a little today. I thought this dastardly flu that I had, had decided to move on and harass another poor human. Unfortunately for me being out in the cold yesterday seems to have brought it all back. However while I sniffle into a tissue i'm still happy that yesterday went the way it did.
The early afternoon started with me meeting Poetic Pilgrimage at St Pauls to get some snaps of them for my Hijab project. Whilst there I learnt that the Rev Jesse Jackson was coming to Occupy London Stock Exchange at St Pauls. I decided despite the cold to hang around. I'll go into detail later in another blog post.
You would think photographing Poetic Pilgrimage and impromptu chance to photograph Jesse Jackson would have been enough for me. No not for this photographer. I still had to make my way across town into the heart of Brixton to visit Jaja Soze at his Brixton based studio.

Jaja recently viewed my blog and I must humbly say liked my work. For me this was fantastic as I actually wanted to talk to him about a project I want to do during the summer, as well as other business opportunities.

For those of you that know of Jaja Soze you can understand why I wasn't sure what to expect. Jaja's reputation and music proceeds him. Ex gang member ,revert to Islam,, Author, active community member,highly charges rapper and a Business man. Which jaja would I be meeting? And how would the experience pan out?

When I arrived at the studios things were pretty busy with young artists dropping in for the studio sessions. It was great to see kids actually taking the art form seriously and dropping some wicked tracks. I could clearly see that not only was the PDC studios offering them a place to nurture their creativity but also encouragement, support and a lot of love. when I initially walked in I found Jaja passing on his hard earned business accuem to a young lady looking to start her own business. As I sat back and observed I could hear some of the straight talking advice he was dishing as well as the encouragement.

When I finally managed to tear Jaja away from advice giving and encouragement for a little chat I found him to be an interesting and vibrant person. On one hand we discussed Islam and his conversion in Egypt to his past in gangs and how it led him to where he is today. I can see from talking to him why he is a role model for a young post riot generation. He understands their struggles, he took the wrong path but with hard work and dedication has become a successful artist and business man. I personally believe we need more role models like this for todays youth. People that they can relate to but that can also explain that success comes with hard work and not by instant gratification.

Needless to say the meeting went well and inshallah if things go well you may see Jaja appearing in my next project.

I can't really end this article without giving a massive shout out to Uncle Frank!! Yep the man behind the screen. You will see him in some of the images posted below. Uncle Frank isn't what you would really call an Uncle as he's only 27 but he's PDC magician...the Sound engineer. And I guess his encouraging nature has earned him that name.

For further information on PDC check out the following link
http://pdcent.com/

Check out some images of the boys at work

JAJA THINKING HARD

UNCLE FRANKS CONCENTRATION FACE

SOME DOWN TIME

JAJA

DIAMOND

Getting in the swing of things

The last few days have been fantastic. Work on my hijab project has began. The first candidates Images have been edited and I am just waiting on her accompany answers to my questions.
I have organised 2 further shoots for this week. I will not spoil it for you by giving too much away but lets just say I am very excited to get the opportunity to take these images.
I am also in the process of setting up some more shoots for over the Christmas period. It finally feels like something which was just a dream for me a few months ago is slowly taking shape.
I have to admit as a photographer some jobs you do for the money and some for the passion and this clearly falls into the category of passion for me. It's what reminds me why I love photography and the power that it holds.

Well guys all I can say watch this space and I really hope that you are as inspired as me by these amazing women. x

HIJAB PROJECT

As many of you may know, I recently came up with an idea for a project on the Hijab. Unfortunately due to business and personal  commitments I had to put this on the back burner for a while. However I am happy to say things are moving forward with this project now.

I cannot describe to you beautiful people how excited I am...this concept has been my baby for a while now. The whole series will be featured on the blog and also Inshallah God willing will be exhibited and even published in the future.
Ok maybe I am getting a head of myself here but who ever said it was wrong to dream big...reach for the stars and if you fail at least you will hit the sky.

Photographs for the first instalments are complete and I am just waiting on the transcript from the young lady and it will be posted online.

I think you will find this series really interesting wether you are muslim or not. This will hopefully reflect the beauty and strength of my Hijab wearing sisters.....

RETURNING THE LOVE - I am a restless being

Today's blog is going to be one filled with love, optimism and excitement.


Up until Nov the 28th I was working as a free lance photographer aiming at setting up her own photography business. Its only as of the 29th of November all my hard work has finally paid off.
The last 6 months have been really difficult in regards to setting up Duniya photos as more than a side thing, I've had to deal with a lot of forms and information gathering, Ive had to chase, rewrite and complain to everyone and his dog until finally the day came that Duniya photos officially launched as a business not just an idea formed and nurtured by a young woman with big dreams.


I cannot express to you how difficult this road to fulfilling my dream has been, for me it has meant a complete change in my life and circumstances. I have gone from a well paid public sector career to pumping all my savings into my aspirations. I've had to leave my flat in London and return to my family home in Berkshire to utilise and reduce my spending. Although I love my parents unconditionally and appreciate all the support they have given me it has been hard to give up my independence. Ive had to cut back on all the things that gave me pleasure from shopping trips to nights out with the girls, I can't afford to travel or enjoy a lot of experience that previously I would have jumped at so easily.


There have been night that I have wept because of the pressure and days where I haven't wanted to get out of bed to face the world.
But regardless of how stressed out or demotivated I felt , I shook myself and carried on knowing that to achieve anything you really want in life is never easy. That Allah/God may give you what you desire but you have to meet him halfway and put in the work. Those days that I felt like giving up, when I thought that this dream was unachievable I was fortunate to have friends and family members that would pick me up and encourage me, support me in my passion and tell me that Inshallah one day all this work would pay off, to give me the strength that sometimes I didn't feel I had.
I cannot express to you how fortunate I feel to have had all of this love and support, how fortunate I am that I had a family that could and is assisting me in anyway that they can. How many people really have that?  How many people have to forget and forgo their dreams because they have no support network?


So yes it has been hard and yes I have been lucky other wise I wouldn't be where I am. About to embark on an amazing journey.


So now that everything is finalised the real hard work begins. I've only taken one step and I have hundreds maybe thousands to more to take yet.


But I am so grateful for how far I have come and how much I have achieved.
This got me thinking. Now that I have my own business is it really just about the money and the success? For me this could never be the case, I know that with the way I was brought up and the way I live my life it had to be about more.. I had to return to the universe/Allah some of what had been handed to me.


So all in all this led me to the conclusion that I wanted to support a charity through my work. I already photograph charity functions and donate shoots to raffles/auctions but I want to do something more substantial related to my business and affected by my earning.
Ultimately I decided that a bulk of my work is done through weddings, a time of happiness and love and what better way then donating a percentage to charity.


So I have decided every year of my company I will choose a different charity to support. Donations will be made via a percentage of the wedding commission and Inshallah/hopefully through some fund raising events. I will be picking smaller charities who may struggle with funding


So I sat and thought about what charity I would like to support in my first year of business and to be honest it was no contest. Restless beings was the first charity to come to mind. If you have read my previous blog post you will know all about Restless Beings and why I am so supportive of this human rights charity.


So I have hit on the idea that any of my customers who become aware of this promotion and quote "I am a restless being to me" will trigger the charity aspect of the company. I will immediately donate 15 % of my commission rate to the charity. I'm hoping as I promote my organisation I will also be promoting Restless beings. I believe many people would love this idea as a percentage of the fee from your big day will be making a difference to someones life, spreading love and positivity
As well as this as the year progresses I am hoping to do some more fundraisers for Restless beings.


So guys and girls if you are getting married and considering booking me please do not forget to tell me that you are a restless being, to help a beautiful charity.


Hopefully my first business year will be very successful and I can pass on some of that love to restless beings.




To access charity contribution please quote "I am a restless being"

Restless beings event @Dgaf Stratford

Last night I had the immense pleasure of photographing a Hip Hop fundraiser for the Charity Restless Beings. http://www.restlessbeings.org/

Restless Beings is an amazing charity that works within the realms of Human rights. The thing that makes Restless Beings really stand out to me as a charity is the fact that everyone involved is a volunteer. No one at restless beings earns a wage and they work tirelessly to raise money for worthy causes from Street children in Bangladesh to raising awareness of the plight of Romany Gipsies. The Restless Beings team hold fundraiser dinners, music nights and even have a stall in Brick Lane. They manage to achieve all this while still being the warmest and smiliest collective of people that i've seen. The dedication and sheer perseverance of the team at Restless Beings has always left me with admiration and with the urge to do something to help. So when the opportunity arose to photograph one of their events held at Dgaf in Stratford I literally jumped at the chance.

The night was also the launch of a weekly conscious hip hop night at Dgaf. Hosted by Bigcakes of peoples Army, one of the funniest dudes I have ever come across...
Dgaf is a new and vibrant restaurant and sheesha establishment in Stratford set in a refurbished old school east end pub, ironic considering Dgaf is a alcohol free zone. Dgaf I have to admit since discovering it recently has become one of my guilty pleasures, the sheesha is made perfectly and to be honest the roof garden is the ultimate in urban chic with graffitied walls and hugh tv screens, the food is absolutely delicious, I do not think there's one thing I haven't tried that hasn't made my taste buds tingle...and believe me I have tried a lot. But the greatest thing is the floors at Dgaf, they have glass panels in the floor which means I can spy on my chef, maybe this way I can get some of those secret recipies. On top of the amazing food and sheesha, the thing that really makes Dgaf for me are the people and what they stand for. The staff are amongst the friendliest I've ever encountered and genuinely seem to love their jobs. The owner Saddiq treats you as if you are entering his personal home and offers his hospitality unflinchingly. On our first meeting I asked him about his vision, it was to create a space for the community a place where positivity and understanding could nurture and grow. A safe haven for all members of the community to come together to learn and enrich each other. For me I believe that Dgaf is living up to that vision.

So really it was a match made in heaven to have such a positive charity hosting an event there. But for me the real icing on the cake was the fact that some of my favourite UK hip hop DJs and acts were performing live.
Djing on the night were the one and only DJ Snuff, a personal favourite of mine, any one that knows DJ Snuff will note that he is one of the most hard working Hip hop DJs in the UK. Alongside DJ Snuff on the deaks was DJ Steaz, not only a gifted hip hop/dubstep DJ but one of the most humble but generous people you could meet.

Performing on the night were such classic acts as my beautiful sisters Poetic Pilgrimage. Any of you that have had the pleasure of seeing these sisters live will know that they ooze culture, knowledge and spirituality. I've never had the chance to photograph them on stage before and I really enjoyed it. I found Poetic pilgrimage to be very expressive on stage so the resulting photographs are to me like crystallised moments in time.

Alongside these ladies on stage was one of the UKs strongest underground rappers Logic. Now I've seen Logic on stage numerous time as well as photographing him and he always manages to get the crowd in an uproar, last night was no different. Photographing Logic is always a hard one as he's extremely energetic and trying to keep up was tiring me out. However I got some shots that I absolutely love.

Now a treat for me was the fact that CaxtonPress were also performing. I had previously heard a buzz about this old school hip hop group and was quiet intrigued to see them perform. And to be honest I wasn't left feeling disappointed at all...CaxtonPress were on point with their performance and I absolutely love their female member Amy True. The passion with which she performs I feel has transcended into the images I took of her. I'm sure you will feel the energy when you have a look.

Also I was in for a little surprise treat that night as I got to learn of a new artist Femi Santiago. Femi sings, plays the guitar and piano. During his rendition of "Giving my rose to you" I found it so difficult to take picture as all I wanted to do was give that music my complete undivided attention. I definitely think this is an artist to watch in the future.

There were many more performance on the night and all of them were amazing I can not fault the standard of any of these artists, everyone of them gave their all.

So really I cannot fault the night in any way, I got to sample the food that I love, listen to amazing music, mingle with conscious people in my safe haven hidden in the heart of east London while taking pictures for Restless beings.

Its times like this I love what I do, to be a part of something so creative, positive and unified. So maybe for me it was more than a nights work or a night out it was a holistic experience, a feeding of the soul.

I highly recommend keeping an eye out for restless beings. Have a look through their sight and please give generously or attend an event.

http://www.restlessbeings.org/

And if you fancy invading my safe haven heres the website for Dgaf

http://www.d-gaf.co.uk/

Now that you have read about my night here's a few sample pictures to share my experience with you, enjoy and feel free to comment xx